My daughter just recently got engaged.
My future son-in-law vowed to keep her pure in the eyes of the Lord.
I told him this was impossible ...
... not unless, he took my short advice.
Here is a verbatim transcript of our conversation at Brooklyn Bridge a few months ago:
Emeka: Poppa, are there any thoughts that you deem important for me during this time of engagement?
Me: About what?
Emeka: My love for your daughter rushes from my heart, I will do all my best to make her happy. Please pray that I achieve this.
Me: Your love for my daughter is really weak. Our hearts are deluded with our own whimsical imaginations. We migrate from lust to love and love to lust in six seconds flat.
Emeka: You make me laugh, Poppa.
Me: No, I am not trying to be a clown. I am just exposing my own struggle. You have a year before the marriage. That is a brutal time of waiting. All these months, you have committed to a life of purity. These next months, are going to be hellish.
Emeka: Why, so?
Me: The human flesh always yields to the heart. When love is at stake, the heart is the last muscle that can be trusted. You will be tempted a million times to violate the pearl that just got reserved for you.
Emeka: I will fight for it, Poppa.
Me: I know you are strong, Emeka. But you will lose.
Emeka: How can I win?
Me: Only if you take my gift seriously.
Emeka: What gift?
Me: Show me your palms.
Emeka: (Unfolds his palms and offers them up for reception) Here they are ...
Me: Here is an invisible rope. It is crafted from Asia. We call it the Abaca Hemp. It is rigid and unbreakable.
Emeka: What is it for?
Me: Draw your palms near, If you wish, I will give you this rope.
Emeka: By all means please, but what is it for?
Me: This is my line. God gave it to me before I got married. The Lord redeemed me from a lustful pigsty and walked me through a new kind of disciplined obedience. He gave me the cord to usher His strength towards my frailty.
Emeka: How did you use it?
Me: On the night of our engagement, I revealed my dark libidinous past to my future bride. I sought her help to aid me in my battle to protect her.
Emeka: How was her reaction?
Me: She stayed on. I said: "I am a lustful man. Apart from God's intervening grace, my beastly greed will destroy your beauty. God has given me this hawser for you to use. I beg you, please thrust this rope to strap me when you sense my sure upheaval.
Emeka: Did she have to use it?
Me: In the course of our six-months engagement, She had to tie me to a chair, twelve times.
Emeka: Please give me the rope, Papa.
Me: By all means, Emeka. You just have to remember, it is no longer your strength that matters. My son, it has to be solely God's.
Photography: Chester Canasa / Manhattan